From the time, we set eyes on each other, ours was a smoking heart.
I knew it right there and then that I wanted him and thought he wanted me, also.
When we said goodnight on my door-steps as his taxi arrived to collect him three months earlier, we were so looking forward to catching up again the coming week. Or so I thought.
It was not to be - and even worse, there was no communication whatsoever from him ever since.
The days passed and I heared nothing of him or from him. As Christmas approached, I became a little unsure and everyday, I became more doubtful, my worries worsened by the uncertainty and mystry of it all.
If had slept with him, I would have either thought I put him off, and atleast, may have boldly and easily thrashed him as another unpleasant and unwanted experience, but I hadn't.
If you are not looking for a quickee, finding true and lasting love, appears to be a little difficult.
As Christmas approached, we got really busy at the office and the anxiety became somewhat cushioned by the distraction the festive season provided.
We had our Christmas dinner early on Saturday the 14th - the very same day that the town centre was bustling with the Winter Warmer Sing Along event.
I escaped the office early and arrived the Square in time to listen to the Woolwich Singer's performance, then walked home - to my lonely world, you could say.
Back to my apartment, I tried to plan for a quiet time for the holidays and went to the Woolwich Library to borrow enough books to keep me indoors.
Even though, I found the time to visit Milton Keynes, to see family for a week, it has been generally uneventful since then, considering my expectations.
And when Magic FM played the David Essex's 1982 classic `Winter's Tale', I thought that was it.."May be I should actually close the door".
The lyrics continued..
"..and anyway, the snow has covered all your footsteps..
".. and I can follow you no more."
It was the very Christmas I thought I would find love. Needless to add here that I spent the day alone, aided by the borrowed books for company.
By the 29th, my hopes had thoroghly faded and of-course, I was still alone. I wasn't going to find love - not this year, I thought. Maybe not ever. But what the hell happened to Johnny?
It's so strange how our hopes slide and turn so quickly into despondency.
But even as the `fires' still burnt at night and my memories so clear, I couldn't really see beyond my front door.
I replayed the song and sang along...
"I wonder if you hear..
I wonder if you're listening..
I wonder where you are today..
good luck I wish you well..
for all that wishes maybe worth..
I hope that love and strenght..
are with you for the lenght..
of your time on earth..
That was untill Monday Morning!
What happened was almost indescribably unbelieveable and yet at this moment, so true.
Being still on holiday, and with the weather warning repeatedly announced on the radio, I had no plan to go anywhere really early.
So, as I was hoping to finish the second of my borrowed novels on that day, I had just fixed myself another cup of coffee, laid down and adjusted well on the divan, when my mobile chimed.
I ignored what for me, was almost an unwanted distraction, and it stayed that way for a few seconds that may have seemed like forever.
`What could possibly be urgent when none of your hopes ever seems to come good?' I thought.
The mobile chimmed again and I picked it up, then the cold shivers ran down my spine a consecutive second time when I heard that voice again (the first time was when we met. I suppose I should save that for another day, if the need to recount it comes calling), then a twing of smile showed on my face as I tremblingly said `hello'.
He said `I am back, in town (as if he had carried me all along), how do I travel to you?, I don't quite remember.'
`Johnny, is that you?' I said, wanting to be sure.
`Yes of-course Veronica, it is me. It's a long story and I will tell you all about it. How do I travel to you?' he asked again.
`I will come and get you, where are you?'
The darn Novel can wait. I rose, suddenly alive, sountered across the floor, trying to fix things, deciding against it, picked up my jacket and car key and off into the rainy outdoors I went.
I picked him up from infront of the DLR Station, having driven round the town centre and we drove straight into the Tesco Car Park, then joined others in the lift up to the shopping floor.
Thank goodness for the changes at the Town Centre, we have serveral options now and the Tesco Cafe was open.
We ordered and settled down on it. Midway into it, I excused myself, kept Johnny going on it and went for a quick shopping inside the mall, as I ran my mind through what I should do next.
Even though, it appeared that I suddenly had hope of finding the elusive love and hopefully, of ending the year with a smile and may be, welcoming the new year with more, I decided to control my excitement.
So, rather than drive straight to my apartment, even though he had been there once, I drove Johnny to the Travelodge along Powis Street, booked him into a room, explaining that my family were just about leaving and that I would be back for him.
He looked surprised as he shot me a look, but said nothing.
As I produced my Debit Card to pay, he said he would pay. I refused and he shot me another look, this time with raised Eyebrows, and again said nothing.
The porter took us up and as he left us, I said I would be back to collect him on my way back, after dropping off the kids (my family).
He agreed and followed me again down to the lobby for a drink. I hit the road, expressionless but calm.
I got back home and jumped up in delight. Whatevever it was, we both appear to be handling it brilliantly.
I am due to meet him later tonight and now, back in my apartment, I thought to share my story. So here I am, pecking away on my desk top. After all, I am supposed to be headed to Strattford to drop off the kids.
I don't know if I am doing the right thing, but hey wish me luck and you might get a sequel to the story, soon.
Have I found love, I don't know until I listen to Johnny's his story.
Veronica, Royal Arsenal, Woolwich.
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