Freedom From The Invisible Prison

by Lucira Jane Nebelung

The Garden of Eden is a metaphor, a myth, and like all myths seeks to justify why things are as they are... only it's not a complete, unbiased story. There is another myth, that of Lilith, who was Adam's first wife. Here is a very brief version of the "full" story.

 

When "God" created Adam from dust, he also created Lilith, also from dust. As Adam's equal, Lilith refused to be submissive sexually (think missionary position) and in a rage left or was cast out of Eden, cursed. (The story lines differ.)   Adam then asked "God" for another "helpmate" and Eve was created from Adam's rib. It was Eve who was tempted by the snake to eat the "forbidden fruit" of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil and so they were cast out of Eden.

 

Here is a bit of perspective: This entire myth is embedded deep in the human psyche with the purpose to justify the patriarchal mindset of hierarchy with power over others and love as approval that permeates our global cultures. The knowledge of good and evil is a metaphor for our free will, to choose love or fear. We made love mean approval, generating all of our fears. This was the "Fall" of humankind or "Original Sin." The message we hold: Love is conditional, based on approved "conditions."

 

Hiding in Plain Sight

 

This one belief, love as approval, is the foundation of the perceived supremacy of the patriarchal mindset governing our culture and invisibly permeating all social structures and every aspect of our lives, including family, religion, government, education, and commerce. It generates hierarchy and expectations along with their need for control, submission and compliance. Love as approval is the root cause of all resentment, conflict, violence, competition, greed, addictions, and the use of force. It sets up the power dynamics of victim, rescuer and perpetrator and fears of betrayal, abandonment and annihilation. What we believe to be "love" is really approval, with attachments to expectations; it's of the mind, not the heart.

 

Myths are archetypes that we live every day and the myth of Eden is no different.  We leave Eden every time choose love as approval and its fear.

Love as approval has us living to please and comply with others' expectations, cuts us off from our own hearts and the Love of Self. Love as approval sets up the consciousness of separation. We look to others, see them as objects, an external source that provides emotional and physical security and support. The myth has been perpetuated from generation to generation for eons and continues even today. When we individually and collectively condemn the inequities and oppression we see elsewhere, we do the same thing; theirs is perhaps more blatant, ours more subtle, but it's there.

 

Any and all creation requires both masculine and feminine energies (not gender). We can call this Will and Love. We have taken "will" to mean "The Father's" Will - love as approval by the patriarchy. This denies and distorts the feminine energy of Love which is open, allowing, accepting, receptive, surrender, and passionate. Love (the feminine energy found in our hearts) births all creation, even in our denial of its presence.

 

Bottom-line, approval is judgment; if we approve we can just as easily disapprove. Love never judges. We were given "free will" as a gift of human consciousness; an innate freedom to choose. Perhaps what is meant by "Will" is really "Truth": "God's Will" is to live the Truth that we are spirit in matter; that we ARE Love. The union of Truth (masculine energy) and Love (feminine energy) within becomes Wisdom in action, the source of all creation.  You might say that Love is The Mother of All. 

 

We have taken this so far that most spiritual teachings and practices until recently have been rooted in the same patriarchal mindset: Transcendence or reaching for (think erection) Truth (mind) by complying with rules and following prescribed rituals. We have not paid much attention to the embodiment of Love (the feminine) within our hearts. Transcendence without embodiment is unsustainable.  

 

We have reached a point that the world we have constructed without the conscious embodiment of Love is no longer sustainable; implosion is imminent. We are witnessing the collapse of love as approval in all of our conflicts and chaos. The patriarchal mindset simply denies the Truth of Love, the heart, while proclaiming the love of truth, the narrow, limiting viewpoints of the mind. Love as approval is the ultimate "evil" - it blocks the flow of both Love and Truth.

True Freedom

 

Today, the USA celebrates Independence Day. Our Declaration of Independence proclaims:

* [ We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all (men) are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain inalienable Rights, that among these are, Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness ].

 

* Statue of Liberty Looks to an illuminated Open Heaven.

These are the three Universal Truths found in all spiritual traditions, Life - Oneness (Love), Liberty - Uniqueness (Truth) and Happiness - Free-will (Wisdom). Love as approval violates our uniqueness and free-will, our liberty and happiness. There is no hierarchy, no approval is required, we are all equal.  

 

At an individual level, love as approval is our root cause addiction, it generates all other addictions. It blocks us from having compassion for ourselves in our imperfection and to seek to escape the pain of separation from our true nature as Truth and Love.    

 

The Psychic Structures of the Superego within the framework of the Enneagram put forth by Russo and Hudson offer a way to see our personalized attachments to love as approval. We are loved, approved of, IF we:

• Do what is right.
• Are loved by others and are close to them.
• Are successful and others think well of us.
• Are true to ourselves.
• Know and have mastered something.
• Are responsible and do what is expected.
• Feel good and getting what we want.
• Are strong and in control of situations.
• Are at peace and others are at peace.

These are virtually impossible to live up to: Who is the judge? What is the standard? Seeking approval both within and from others crushes our freedom to be Loved.

Each of us is here to contribute a unique aspect of Love and Truth in a unique way. Integration, integrity, is living the Truth of Love and the Love of Truth, both transcendence and embodiment. It is the integration of our mind, heart, body and soul (or whatever word works for you). This is our Centerpoint for Being, the footing and foundation for Living the True Self. Deep in our psyche from the myth of Eden we hold the fear that Living the True Self will result in betrayal, abandonment and annihilation: the loss of love as approval. We are never free.  Are you standing as Love and Truth or perpetuating love as approval?  Our greatest legacy is the transmission of our unique energy of Love and whatever our consciousness of "love" is, is what we pass on.    

Love is acceptance and appreciation of what is, never approval. We deeply desire to be appreciated and cherished just for who we are.  Appreciation is the energy of Love. Vulnerability is our greatest strength of Self Love.  We feel the desire for acceptance and appreciation - love.  The desire for approval usurps our desire for love. We get the approval and it doesn't fill our underlying need for love in any kind of sustainable way.  On this Independence Day just notice where you may be locked in the prison of approval in the freedom to be your Self or imprisoning someone else. 

We, as a nation, have as our founding principles and have offered the world the blueprint to step free of our personal and collective nightmare of love as approval. Love created us and moves us. Invite Love to come alive within you. Freedom is alignment with Love and Truth. Step into your Freedom.

The Centerpoint for Being is what you came to stand for and contribute to Life, your Truth and Love, the Wisdom, Freedom and Independence from social conditioning and approval. It is the highest Vision for yourself; the unity of you with You. Living the True Self is your fulfillment and calls forth your innate wholeness into visibility. Take charge of your Life and embody transcendence. Dare to be vulnerable, open to Love and Truth. Let Freedom ring in your heart.  Let this capture your focus and be Free.

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* Lucira Jane Nebelung, Founder & Principal of "Leading as Love", is a faculty member at The Graduate Institute. She writes from Connecticut, USA.

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